Just in case anyone is wondering how Lena and I look. I figured you guys deserve pictures after me not writing for 5 years. Sorry. Life just went to press forward after high school.

The ending of "Where it's White and Cold"

I get my sign when I hear a rough “You better give me your cardboard or it’s your head.” Masha. I take Lena’s hand in mine. There she is. Taking the cardboard from a boy who looks like he is about to pee his pants. I roll my eyes, feeling sorry for the guy. Lena saw her too and started jumping in place.

            “Masha! Let’s go slide with Masha! Let’s go!” she cried.  

            Masha hears Lena and turns her head towards us. I wave. She turns back to the boy and tells him to get lost, and then she strides towards us. She is smiling at Lena like she is going to eat her or something. Even though Lena sees Masha being mean to other kids, she trusts her. I guess its cause she sees me trusting Masha. I shouldn’t do that too much anyways.

            “Hey! Give me her!” Masha stands across from Lena and me. Lena lets go of my hand and hugs Masha around her waist.  

            “Hey, Lennok. Are you cold?” Masha picks Lena up in her arms.

            I smile as I watch Lena shake her head and them talking quietly. I’m glad Lena makes Masha smile. There are not a lot of people who make Masha smile. Of course, Lena with her green, bright eyes and dancing curls makes a lot of people smile. But, Masha doesn’t give in to people as much as she trusts Lena. She gives Lena the kind of attention that Lena needs. I don’t know if it’s because of me. I like to think that it is because Lena is cute and Masha actually has a heart, not because I’m Lena’s sister and she feels obligated to like Lena. You never know with Masha, though. But, when I see her talking quietly to Lena like she’s doing now, I believe she is being sincere. The way she grabs Lena by her shoulders and intensely in her eyes, telling her to be a good girl and beat up everybody who stand in her way. The way she touches her nose, playfully, with her finger tip and makes Lena giggle.

            “Tania, you can go play I can take care of her.” Masha says, still looking at Lena.

            “Thanks but no thanks.” I answer, folding my arms. I know she is being nice (which to most people she is not), but with today’s new snow, I want Lena by my side.

            She looks at me with shocked look on her face, “Why? Jenia is going to be with me.”

            I’m thinking how she and Jenia have been spending too much time together. They’re probably going out. This is a problem. What if they take Lena, but are too involved with each other to pay attention to her? Usually, they very good at bringing Lena safely back to me. Masha is definitely the kind of girl nobody wants to mess with, so Lena doesn’t get bullied. Jenia is huge and whenever Lena falls or get’s hurt, he just picks her up and makes her feel better. I’ve watched them play with her before, just to see if Lena is okay. I don’t watch them anymore. But, I did notice how much more they flirt with each other now. I can’t let Lena be with them.

            “No, it’s fine. I don’t think I’ll be playing with anyone today anyways.” I tell Masha.

            She looks at me, like, Really-I-Don’t-Think-So. Lena is looking from me to Masha back and forth as we talk. I could tell she wants to go sledding. But with who? Before I could bear her to it, Masha turns to Lena,

            “Who do you want to go sledding with, Sweetie Pie?” she asks her. I raise my eye-brow. It was really unnecessary for her to stick the “Sweetie pie” part in there.

            Lena looks at me, her green eyes pleading me to say something, to decide for her. But I stay quiet, because I can’t decide for her. Well, I can, but we all know what I’d choose.

            Instead I look at Masha and give her the I-Told-You-This-Wouldn’t-Work glare. She sticks her tongue at me puts Lena down. And at the very same time, we take Lena’s both hands. Masha and I look at each other. Lena looks at both of her hands. Poor girl. I don’t see why it’s so important for Masha to take Lena today. I guess she is always like this when it comes to her thinking that I should go have fun. Or when it comes to her showing off to Jenia how she can get good with kids?

            “Why are we making such a big deal…” I start and then see that Masha is not paying any attention. Instead looking at something to her left and smiling. I follow her eyes and see Jenia.

            Remember how I said that Sasha has good build? Well, Jenia has an even better build. I’m not going to start describing his build, but he does have one of those six packs and tan skin. When a girl sees Sasha, they want to talk to his and see his flirt. When they see Jenia, all they want to do is stare. Plus, he is like Masha; it’s too risky to communicate with him. Maybe he and Masha are meant to be. Not only are they the same way as far as personality and morals go, but also they both look like movie stars (um, the movie star in the orphanage…not in the real world, because I’m pretty sure real world stars do not have yellow teeth). Jenia has jet black hair that look naturally messy, chocolate brown eyes that always look dangerous, olive skin, and this deep voice.

            “What do I see? Are we fighting over Lennok? Again?” he looks at us as he comes closer. His voice has this drag to it, like he’s enjoying every word he is saying.

            “Aren’t you cold?” Masha actually stands a little straighter. I’m guessing that’s for looking more confident.

            “I asked you a question first”, he gives her his crooked smile.

            Masha rolls her eyes, trying to stay cool and says “No, seriously”.

            But it was a dumb question for her to ask because Jenia never has a shooba (those fluffy, big coats that smart people wear when it’s below zero outside) or mittens on. He says he always get’s too hot after sliding after a while. He doesn’t care how many times Vladimera orders him to find his shooba.  She doesn’t bother him that much though, because nobody wants to mess with Jenia. And couldn’t Masha see the sweat that is on Jenia’s neck and part of his sweater?   

            Masha looks at me for a moment and then says “Give me a sec”. She let’s go of Lena’s hand and walks to Jenia. They put their arms around each other and kiss. My eyes widen even though I’m not that surprised. Kids start to gather a little and I cover Lena’s eyes. I was right. They can’t keep Lena. I look at people who gathered. There are only two girls who look sickened and three guys who are laughing. I glare at the guys to shut them up because they are so not allowed to laugh at my friends. One of them says,

            “What? You don’t think this is funny? They are going to get in trouble.”

            No, not really. I don’t really think that’s funny. I don’t know, maybe it’s just me, but seeing friends getting separated because they got in trouble together, does not make me laugh. I wait for Masha and Jenia to be done, looking around make sure no ladies are round. Masha finally turns away from Sasha, I uncover Lena’s eyes.

            “That was a lovely show, thank you, I’m going to go now” I say, glaring at Masha and turning around to go.

            She grabs Lena’s hand and says “Wait, don’t you want to go play?”

            Is she freaking kidding me? Was she trying to be funny?

            “No” I answer her stubbornly.

            “And why not?”

            “You just showed me why not.”

            “You didn’t have to watch.”

            “That’s not the point. The point is that I’m not letting you and Jenia play with Lena if you two are going to make-out the whole time”

            “We are not going to!”

            “How do I know that? You just proved me that you are going to.”

            “No, that was only one time!”

            “Well, one time was…”

            “You GUYS! Stop arguing!” Jenia breaks in. Oh sure, he decided to interrupt when I was speaking.

            “…enough.” I finished anyways.

            Jenia walks over to Masha and talks to her quietly. I look at Lena and was about to ask her if she was okay, but I saw that she had a smile on her face. That makes me relax and smile a little too.

            “You think this is funny” I pinch her red cheeks.

            She giggles, “They kissed” and points at Jenia and Masha.

            I roll my eyes “Yep, they did.” I pick her up.

            “Can we all slide together today like that one time, remember? You were so happy! Remember, Tania? Please?” she says fast and make a puppy face.

            I think about that. And as I’m thinking about it, Jenia comes over to me.

            “Why don’t we all just slide together? Mashka says she’d be fine with that.”

            I look at Lena who still has a puppy face on and then smile at Jenia and answer,

            “Well, tell that Mashka, that I am fine with that also”

            Masha passes by me, “I knew you’d say yes”, then she winks at Lena who happily says to Masha “You kissed him!”

            Then the four of us meet the steep hill. Get ready, leg muscle, you are about to climb that hill.

               

Continuation of "Where it's White and Cold"

“Len, it is okay, there are no bears in the forest during the winter”, Sasha was comforting Lena, as I tuned in their conversation. I didn’t even notice they were talking.

            “How about during summer?” Lena asks and I could hear a frown in her face.

            “Len, the bears sleep during the summer” I answer her and instead of walking behind Sasha, I ran to his side and put my hand on Lena’s back.

            “No, they sleep during the winter, but they are so nice during the summer don’t wont eat you, Len.” Sasha corrected me. Whatever, Mr. Smarty-pants.   

            “Well, what if they wake up during the winter? How do you know they are nice?” Lena asks quickly.

            “They don’t wake up because they are too warm and cozy.” I answer her first question and put her scarf on her red nose.

            “Bears have a lot of berries to eat during the summer, so they’re happy” Sasha responds to Lena’s second question, as he pulls Lena up. She was sliding down his back a little.

            “So, the bears won’t eat me?” Lena says, carefully.

            “Nope.” Sasha and I answer at the same time. We look at each other and smile briefly.

            “Not even Tania?”

            “No, Len, not even me. It’s okay.” I reassure her.

            “How about Vladimera?” Lena looks at me with this silly smile that makes me think she’s up to something.  

            “Not even Vladimera.” Sasha says. Even though I was supposed to answer her. She looked at me! Plus, I know what she’s thinking!

            “Dang it.” Lena replies, smile fading from her face.

            “No, I’m telling you. The bears can sense mean people, so they would eat Vladimera for sure” I tell Lena, giving Sasha a next-time-let-me-answer look.

            “Haha told you the bears would eat her!” Lena yells to Sasha and her left hand punches his shoulder. She never said such a thing. She might have believed it in her mind, though.  

            “Hey, you don’t want me to die or faint again, do you?” Sasha says teasingly to Lena.

            “No!” Lena and I both exclaim.

            “That’s what I thought.” Sasha smiles at us.

            We enter the forest. Some trees here won’t let the sunshine in, since they are so tall and big, but we see sin-beam spots in some places. Most all trees are tall and green.  All of the trees have snow on their branches keeping the trees warm. I always see the snow clearer here, because the sun is not shining on it as much. It always looks slightly blue. Most snow is covered by branches that fell from the trees on a windy night. The hills are all clear, because we sled on them so much. I find a spot in the sky where there were no trees in the way and notice that the sky is blue and clear with no clouds. The wind is calming down too. Good. It means that Lena might not get a cold sore this time. Speaking of Lena…

            “I can take Lena now, you go slide” I tell Sasha. He put Lena down on her feet, hugs her goodbye, waves at me, and runs off.   People are now running with their card boards on different hills, debating on which hill is the fastest. I look for any signs of Masha or Jenia.  Not that I want to give Lena away, I just need company.

Continuation of "Where it's White and Cold"

The snow under my feet is still so fluffy that I wonder how in the world Sasha is managing with carrying Lena on his back. Yesterday the snow was hard as wood. It would make squeaky sounds when we walked on it. Today with all the new snow on the ground, snow makes “snow tornadoes” as Lena calls them. Tomorrow the snow will get hard again and a lot higher too.

            There are not a lot of trees here on the field that we are crossing, but once in a while we pass a tree and it makes me feel tall. I love when the snow becomes deeper and deeper, because then I grow taller and taller; always makes me feel good.

            The snow started falling again. I stared at Sasha’s boots crushing through the snow and hiding under it with every step he takes, in front of me. My nose and cheeks are starting to freeze up; I could feel a tingle of wind on my skin. Licking my lips doesn’t help much either, seeing as how they are starting to split up. But lip is the only thing that I could bite in right now. My fingernails are hiding warmly in my mittens, and it’s not worth getting my fingers cold just to bite nails. Pretty much every time we go to the forest, I get nervous like this. Because pretty much always someone get’s hurt, whether it is a small injury or big. This last week, a small, weak boy his arm when he landed on it after a bump on a hill. The hills are huge in the forest. We call them giant hills, because for giants they would be hills also. They hills also have ice on them. That’s mostly why kids get hurt. Ice makes the hills fun, but with ice hard. Everybody thinks the ice is worth it, though. We try to ignore the fact that ice is the main reason we get hurt. Even the ladies ignore that fact. Kids love the icy hills; they can go fast. Lena loves it too and that makes me smile for a little.

            Still, as I’m walking in the wind, I frown again. Lena is small…tiny actually. I always have to go down the hill with her or else her light body will get tumbled in someone’s huge body, down the hill. Or someone takes her cardboard that she found to slide on. Sometimes, Masha and Jenia would bug me about how I’m not having fun and take Lena with them. I do have fun with her though. Her giggles always echo around the forest and she tries to cover my eyes when we go down the hill.  Plus, usually I don’t trust anybody taking care of Lena. I worry that something will happen to her and I’m not there, so whenever I’m not with her I constantly think where she is and who she’s with. I’d trust Sasha, but he is usually helping girls have fun or the girly-girls who broke their nails. Brother. I try to tell him that he has better things to do than help girls who just want his help for attention, but he turns to me and says that he can say the same thing to me about Lena. But hello! It’s different, she’s my sister. And he, being such a good church boy that he is, says that the girls are basically his sisters too. How sweet. Not.

                           

           

Continuation of "Where it's White and Cold"

There are girls in our orphanage who are “girly-girls” with lots of a make-up and stylish clothes. There are girls we call “mad girls”, the ones who get mad at the adults, teachers, kids, and with this negative attitude they complain. The third kind of girls are the “bad girls” and they are the ones who smoke, cut themselves, hang out with bad boys, and break the rules (Masha is one of those). The last ones are the “tomboys”, they mostly hang out with guys, they usually have a sibling to take care of in the orphanage, and they do well in school but they still get in a lot of trouble because they don’t believe in things that they are being taught. Those are the names we categorize girls in the orphanage. People call me “tomboy” and I’m fine with it. Most “girly-girls” are jealous of the “bad girls”, because the “bad girls” are the ones who have more fun hanging out with guys and are the best at stealing so they have more things.  

            The “girly-girls” are the ones that are talking to Sasha right now. Lena kneels down, picks up a handful of fluffy snow, makes a “snowball” (which looked nothing like a snowball, because the snow was too fluffy and Lena only picked up a small amount with her small hand), and throws it at Sasha. I bet Sasha could see who threw it from his peripheral vision, he probably could tell who threw it by the way the “snowball” was thrown, because he turns around, puts his hand on the shoulder that got hit, and in this dramatic way falls to the ground. I roll my eyes, while Lena runs up to him.

            “You killed him, Len.” I tell her.

            She grabs snow and rubs it on Sasha’s face, “That should wake him up.”

            Sasha doesn’t budge and the “girly-girls” come closer. I look around. There were kids walking our way, some go around us, but some stop and watch. Most of the kids are already way ahead. It makes me nervous because I want to meet up with Masha and Jenia.

            I hear “girly-girls” giggling and it brings my attention back to Lena. She is untying Sasha’s scarf. Somebody yells “it’s not like the scarf is killing him!” and I turn around to give that somebody a mean face that says Don’t-Mess-With-My-Sister-She’s-Only-Seven.

            “Len, let’s go, he’ll wake up once we leave, okay?” I say, knowing she’s not going to listen to me.

            “No”, she answers. Who called it! She pats Sasha’s face with the scarf.

            “I’m serious, we need to…” I started, but Lena goes, “Make him alive!” Geez, demanding much. What am I, a god or something?

            “No, do you want to see…” I began.

            “Maybe somebody should give him a kiss.” Ira pointed out.  Leave it up to a “girly-girl” to a) interrupt me so rudely (what is this, Interrupt-Tania-Day?), and b) bring up something from fairy tales.

            I look from her to Sasha. He still hasn’t moved an inch. I’m beginning to wonder if Lena’s lame snowball really did knock him out. Ira steps closer to him and I block her way and say,

            “I know what will make him realize that he is wasting our time”. Then I swish saliva in my mouth so he could hear that I’m about to spit on him and then I spit. My spit landed near him, but like I planned, didn’t touch him.

I shrug my shoulders and say “it’s the thought that counts”

 Everybody laughs but Sasha doesn’t move.  Lena claps her mittens. Ira pushes me aside, sits on her knees and announces,

            “I’m going to kiss him”. All the girly-girls giggle again and cheer for her.

            Alright, I think I want to see this. I know he won’t let her kiss him. Ira is the worst girly-girl of all the girly-girls and he will not be happy when his friends found out that Ira kissed him (or that he got knocked out from Lena’s snowball, for that matter).

            Sasha’s eyebrows come together for a brief second. I see it and smile. He is not really knocked out, he’s just enjoying the attention.  Lena doesn’t see it and still thinks that the kiss will wake him up. She jumps with her hangs clasped together.  Ira’s pink hat falls on her forehead as she get’s closer to Sasha’s face. Her eyes closed and her long, blond eye-lashes fall on her cheeks as she gets two more inches closer. The kids around hold their breath and smile silently. I’m surprised that they are still standing here; I’m getting cold from standing for so long. I guess this will be juicy gossip for them to spread later. Ira opens her eyes a little and places her hand on Sasha’s cheek. Sasha twitches. I smile bigger. What is he going to do? I’m surprised he is holding out this long.

            When Ira’s lips almost touch Sasha’s, all of the sudden he opens his eyes and yells,

            “Boo!”

            Ira screams and jumps up and runs. All the girly girls follow her, screaming. Kids are laughing around me, including Sasha who stood up. Lena hugs him,

            “He’s alive, he’s alive!” she squeals with happiness. He starts tickling her and she runs back to me.

            “I knew you were going to do something like that. I’m surprised you didn’t smile.” I say to Sasha, laughing. He can’t stop laughing, so I continue “You were just laying there and I really thought that you maybe died, but then your huge eye brows moved.”

            “Yeah right! You wanted to kiss me, didn’t you?” Sasha finally says.

            “Oh. Totally. You had your eyes closed so you didn’t see me when I pushed Ira out of my way., I say and start laughing again. Lena laughs too, even though she probably doesn’t understand what the heck we’re talking about.  We stood there laughing, as the other kids started walking away. Then, Sasha picks Lena up and throws her on his back. He pulls my hat down to my eyes again and says,

            “And my eye-brows aren’t huge”

            I push my hat away from my eyes, still sort of laughing, and follow Sasha’s foot steps. Most kids were already in the forest. After laughing, it doesn’t bother me anymore that I might not find Masha and Jenia. So, I just follow Sasha with Lena on his back, into the forest.      

           

Continuation of "Where it's White and Cold"

            The trees have snow on the branches, the ground is icy, and our old playground is frozen. We all walk to the forest, passing the playground and other groups from the orphanage making a tall slide out of snow. I remember the time when I kissed the playground during a winter and my lips got stuck to it. I didn’t have mittens on, because I was just outside to get the clean clothes that were outside drying. My hands were already dry and they got red fast as I tried to pull my lips back. I remembered how I heard from ladies that when we are cold to use our warm breath, and so I tried to stick my tongue out thinking if I lick the playground it will melt.  My tongue ended up getting caught instead. I remember feeling scared. What if I stay here for a long time and nobody finds me? It was night-time, so what if they leave me here for the night?

            I stood with my tongue out like that for about an hour. At least it seemed like an hour. But things do go slower when you are waiting for something. I thought Tatiana (the cleaning lady) might come, but I guess she was too busy cleaning. The weather was cold and windy. I cried. I think they needed clothing for the babies because I finally heard a door open. I have never been so happy for that sound. I heard footsteps behind me and tried to turn my head, but it didn’t quite work well.

            “Who are you sticking your tongue at?” a boy’s voice said behind me. Great, they sent a guy for the clothes. How is he going to help me? I thought. I couldn’t really talk without sounding like something he might laugh at, so I just started crying. The boy stood there for some time. I pulled on the lip again, but it started bleeding. Only then, the boy ran back towards the door yelling,

            “Need a hot cloth!”

            Tatiana was with him when he came back. She brought a hot, wet cloth and that melted off the ice on the metal. She kept saying things like "Oh my, thank goodness we got to you, you will be okay soon", as she gently patted around my mouth.  I remember feeling free after she was done. The boy gave me his mittens and his jacket and we all walked back inside. I never forgot the boy. He got transfered to my group when I turned nine and I found out his name was Yura. He was the best friend. The one who stole apples with me and climbed apples trees. The one who had the best idea for making houses in bushes during summer. He would find the best kind of cardboard near the stores and we’d find a full bush and make a house there. He would also stand up for Lena. Now he can’t. He was sent to a hospital and never came back. Some say he died from an illness, some kids say he got kidnapped when he tried to run away from the hospital, some say his birth parents took him back home. I’ll never forget his last words to me. It was the day he got sent off. We climbed a really high tree and found branches to sit on. He got this far away look and said,

            “There’s a real life up there". Everyone said this at the orphanage, because we knew there was life other than the orphanage.

            So personally, I think he ran away from the hospital, his birth parents found him on the streets, and he died from the disease because his parents couldn’t pay for the medicine. Well, that's what I think anyway.  

           It’s been a year since then. I don’t have as good of a friend as he was, but my guy friends stand up for Lena.

            I put my hand on Lena’s shoulder and press harder to keep her from slipping. You’d think with the big coat Lena’s shoulder would feel big, but her shoulder felt really small. She’s tiny, how can I not be protective over her? She is seven and she weighs, like, 40 pounds. Of course, we’ve been in the orphanage for two years now, so she was even smaller when we first came. But, she eats so much. I don’t get it. Maybe it’s the whole, I-throw-up-after-eating-ten-plates-of-food thing. I don’t know.

            Twenty other kids ran/jumped/skipped/danced/whatever-that-one-person-was-doing (a dog walk?) around us. Some throwing snowballs at each other, some sledding on their rears or feet, some eating snow, and some just looking around and laughing at everybody. That would be me (except, I don’t laugh just smile).

            “Think fast!” I heard a deep, full of laughter voice. And the next thing I see is a snowball flying my way. Super. Just great. I don’t do anything; just move Lena to my side because the snowball was coming down in front of me, where she was walking. The snowball hits me on my thigh. Sasha runs up to Lena and me. He tickles Lena through her coat. She giggles even though it’s obvious that the coat is too thick for Sasha to get her ribs. Then, he pulls my brown hat down to my eyes playfully, and says, “You’re not a fast thinker” and runs off. I stick my tongue at his back. Luckily, this time, it didn't stick to anything.  

            There are kids in the orphanage that remind me just how hard life can be. But there are those like Sasha who remind me that there’s such a thing as hope. Sasha is a handsome, fourteen-year-old, with sky-blue eyes that spark with a smile, tan skin even during the winter, dimples even when not smiling, and already he had a nice muscles build (which all the girls can’t seem to stop talking about). On top of all that, he helps out with kids, and “loves, loves, loves” (as he puts it) little babies. We became friends after this one time when he washed baby pants for me. We had jobs and one of them was to wash the baby's tights, since there were no diapers for them.  The tights were their diaper. Joy. It was my job and I didn’t want to do it. I guess he did. I decided it would be a good idea to become his friend right then and there. Except later, I didn’t need him as a friend just to wash baby pants for me. I needed him to remind me that life is good. He’s good at reminding me about that. One of the examples was just a second ago.

            I free my hand from Lena’s (who grabbed it after Sasha left) to pull my hat back from my eyes. Lena was looking towards where Sasha ran.

            “I want to be as fast as him” she says and points.

            “You will, don’t worry” I respond and add, “Do you want to catch him? You can throw a snowball at him, I give you permission. In fact, I’ll hold him still for you. And you can…”

            “Yes, yes yes!” Lena grabs my hand again and pushes through the crowd of kids.

            I ran with her, trying hard not to slip. We pass the corner of the fence and I see him. He was teasing three girls, who were blushing at his teasings.

           

Continuation of “Where it’s White and Cold”

Everybody is still near Vladimera, gathering around her, some still rinsing dishes. I sneak in the room full of lockers, where we keep our clothes and get dressed. The room is as big as our sleep room. The lockers are assigned to two partners and those partners’ mittens, winter boots, furry coats, scarves, and soft, made-of-rabbit hats (my favorite) are in the shelves of the lockers. The reason we were assigned partners is to help us get dressed, with so many things to put on, it just goes faster to have somebody’s help. I got assigned Lena. I’m glad, not only because I don’t like the thought of somebody else helping her, but also because some people got assigned weird people. Since we have more boys in our group, some girls have to have guys help them. Masha has Sashka. Jania isn’t happy about that.

            The lockers are different sizes and different colors. I’ve always liked that for some reason, it makes it more fun I guess. Lena’s and my locker is faded yellow and the smallest locker out of the room. The locker is big enough though to fit our huge coats. There are two hocks, one is for Lena’s coat and the other one is for my coat. Our boots are on the bottom shelf and our scarves, mittens, hats were on the top, bigger shelf. I sneak to the locker room first, because the room gets crowded and noisy, so I take Lena and me to the bathroom to get dressed.

            I open the locker, put Lena’s and my mittens and scarves in the pockets of our coats, put our hats inside the coats’ hoods, grab boots and with all of that walk to the bathroom just as the other kids start to come in.

After putting clothes in the bathroom, I go back to the kitchen to find Lena still eating. Vladimera tried to get Lena to stop eating once, but got bitten and thrown up on. Now, Tatiana, the cleaning lady of our group waits for me to talk to Lena. Vladimera tries to stay away from Lena as much as possible.

            “What plate is that, fourth?” I ask Lena, sitting down next to her.

            “Yes”, she answers with a full mouth.

            “The clothes are in the bathroom” I tell her with hope that she would understand that I wanted her to come.

            “And they are waiting for us”, I add after a moment of her chewing silently, ignoring me.

            “Yes” is what I get for a reply.  

            I could tell that she’s not going to stand up just yet. So, I start telling her that there is more snow outside and that we are going on big, gigantic hills, that I’ll help her make a snow woman (she doesn’t like making “boy out of snow”, as she always says), and that I promise stay still when she throws a snowball at me. Lena begins to smile.

            “Can I burry you under the snow?” she asks.

            I knew it will get her out of the table so I nod.  Lena promptly scoots her chair away from the table and let’s me pick her up. I carry her to the bathroom and put her down on the wooden floor. Then, I turn around and close the white with pink flowers curtains. When I’m done I turn back to Lena who already has her coat on. I helped her button the coat up to her chin.

            “Now, be careful” I say, “its cold and we haven’t had our shots yet. So, if you get hot, do not talk your coat off. Understand?”

            “Yes”, she responds, as I put her white hat on her small head and tuck her hair inside it.

            “Also, it’s very slippery. So, promise to not slip on the stairs, okay?” I tell her and she lifts her foot up as I place her boot on it.

            “Yes…but can I slide on the road?”

            “No. Do you remember how last year you fell on your back and hit your head? Remember, how it hurt for a long time and you couldn’t sleep?”

            Lena frowns. She should be frowning at the memory, but I know she’s frowning at the “no”.

            “Promise you wont slide.” I order her and look at her straight in the eyes, even though I should be looking at my hands making sure I’m tying her scarf comfortably enough.

            “I guess so.” She answers in a small voice, her bottom lip pouting a little. but, I’m happy again, because a) at least she said something other than a “yes”, and b) she looks cute with her lip like that.

            “Okay” I kiss her nose “Wait, I’ll be fast”.

            And with that, I start putting my clothes on. When I was almost done with my scarf, we hear a knock on the door. Lena runs up and opens it, because if she didn’t they would, it’s not like the door has a lock. It would make situation worse if Lena didn’t open the door. I promised to remind myself to thank her later.

            “Are you girls ready, she’s waiting”, Tatiana’s calm voice says.

            “You’re making us late!” we hear Vladimera’s voice.  

            I finish my scarf, grab Lena’s hand, and walk out the door, mouthing “thank you” to Tatiana. I’ve always liked her. She let’s us call her by her first name even though she’s older than Vladimera and she let’s us get away with things like breaking the rules.

            When we get outside, it’s freezing. It was beautiful with the snow glistening in the sun and the way the snow made the roads look softer, but the cold air was still there. I feel it on my face as soon as we get outside and I’m glad for the scarves that cover up Lena’s and mine necks.